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Tuesday, June 22, 2004

HERE'S A THRILL, THE BEANS I WILL SPILL: SCHILL THE SHILL TO TAKE THE HILL SO TAKE A CHILL PILL

As I predicted, the flipflopper Curt Schilling will make his next start tonight. Despite the denials and predictions that he would miss his start from many unreliable, unsourced, attention lusting wannabe-blogs, Yip Dawg had it right-- Schilling will start tonight. It's a done deal. IF SCHILLING DOESN'T MAKE HIS START TONIGHT AS I PREDICTED THEN THIS WEB SITE WILL GO DARK. There, how's that for putting my credibility on the line? How do you like them apples all you jealous haters who live to bait me? Where ar eyou now? YIPYIPYIPYIP!!!!!!!!!!


Friday, June 18, 2004

NOMAH HATES YOU BOSTON!!!!!

California Gar-see-ya-later-parra in his latest thin skinned tirade goes off on everyone in New England. What a shock. Like it's our fault this slacker goldbricked in Pawtucket too long, claiming he wasn't ready, when he was really sticking it to the fans? And then he comes back and stinks out the joint, what a sack of you know what. Too worried about his fat contract is what I say. Why can't this guy take a cue from the Gamer Nixon, who hurried back from his tragic injury and played almost as soon as the California Diva? Some guys are gritty grimy Gamers, and then you have the pampered loafers from California who hate it here. How could anyone hate it here? Gamer Nixon probably loves it here, and you can just tell that Clutch Tek loves it here too, even though he never says so. He doesn't have to, just look at his big muscles and dirty uniform and crew cut. That's a MAN'S MAN. Clutch Tek is a man's man, and Gar-see-ya-later-parra should try to be more like him, instead of worrying about his contract. YIPYIPYIP!!!!!!


SCHILLING FLIP-FLOPS ON MISSING START CONTROVERSY!!!!!


My sources tell me that Media Whore Curt Schilling will now MAKE his next start, flip-flopping more than John Kerry in a Chinese Acrobat show. Schilling was reported to be MISSING his next start, but now he's apparently chosen to sideswipe the local media-- AKA the voice of the FANS-- and go to some message board to announce his flip-flop. Typical. Good thing the Yip Dawg was all over this from the start, breaking the story and covering this whole Issue like Kevin Millar on a bucket of KFC! Schilling needs to get down off his high horse and stop baiting the media. Is he starting, is he not-- what a diva! It's hard to believe this guy even has a regular name! Anyway, the point is, you can count on THE YIP DAWG to be in the middle of every swirling controversy that affects your Red Sox! That's why I'm almost part of the real media now! YIPYIPYIP!!!!!
SCHILLING TO MISS START; LIES ABOUT IT


Hola amigos, long time no see! Yipyipyipyip!!!!

I am BACK baby, and I've got another hot scoop: Former Hero Curt Schilling will MISS his next start! That's right, he's too injured to pitch and will miss his start, you heard it here first. My unassailable unnamed sources in the clubhouse tell me that it's 100% a DONE DEAL that Schilling will miss this start. Take it to the bank. I dont care if Schilling himself telsl you that he's going to pitch. If he says that he's lying. I will SHUT DOWN THIS SITE IF SCHILLING MAKES HIS NEXT SCHEDULED START. How do you like them apples?

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